So this is "mom guilt?"

I think i have my first case of what they call "mom guilt." We just got home from the pediatrician. Drew has a double ear infection. :( Why the mom guilt? Because its Friday, and in hind sight he's been fussy since Monday.
-He wouldn't drink his bottles as usual, but would arch his back and fuss. It would take him 45 minutes to finish a bottle instead of his usual 15. I just thought it was reflux. I remember texting Zac Monday afternoon that he'd fought me on the last four bottles in a row, and I was exhausted from trying to get him to eat.
-He hasn't been napping or sleeping well. I just thought it was a new phase. Apparently there's something known as the four month sleep regressions, so I just assumed maybe that's what it was.
-He has been arching back his back a lot all week. All the readings say this is reflux (and we'd seen him do this some before), so we just figured it was the reflux. Although this week, he's been arching it like crazy. He would dig his heels in and almost try to flip over in his swing or sleeper or bouncer, and when you're holding him he's try to arch his back so far he could look at the ground...upside down. Guess I should've realized it was much more frequent and severe. I chalked it up to reflux.
-Drew was particularly cuddly this week. He let me hold him like a baby several times, and even fell asleep in my arms a few times. He hasn't done that in a long time. I never thought there had to be a cause or explanation for this, so I never even tried to find a reason for this great quality!
Anyways, something inside me told me to call the nurse Friday late morning. I was just sure they needed to up his reflux dosage (he's outgrown it before, and increasing it made a world of difference). The nurse told me that it sounded like it could be his ears, plus the doc wouldn't want to increase the dose without a new accurate weight, so to make an appointment. I was a little weary to take him to a doctor's office for reflux, knowing there would be flu and strep germs galore. Anyways, I made the appointment and took the little man. He weighed 13 pounds 12 ounces! I explained everything to the pedi (who has a 29 year old daughter with ulcerative colitis!!), and then he examined him. I was so shocked and instantly sad when he told me he has a double ear infection! :( he's been trying to tell me ALL! WEEK! LONG! that he didn't feel well, and I never got the message! Poor guy! At least next time I know what to look for. I'm learning as I go, and I know Drew forgives me. :) I just hate that I made him suffer longer than he needed to. Sigh...I guess this mommy guilt is a powerful thing.
***its now Saturday (the following day). I just logged on to blogger to proofread and publish this post, and I must share that I already don't feel guilty anymore. (phew!) but I do still feel sad that he's hurting. He was pretty fussy today and I know he's uncomfortable. Hopefully the meds will kick in by the morning and we will all be happier! :)